Welcome to the latest installment of the week’s funniest dad memes and tweets.
Grab a seat and enjoy this collection of dad jokes, puns, memes, and rants from some funny AF dads.
Looking at a restaurant menu and my daughter accurately notes, “If you put ‘Buttermilk’ in front of anything, you know it’s good,” like some kind of 13 y/o Paula Dean.
— NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) August 8, 2023
Me: I only want two strips of bacon.
Buffet bacon: Have this clump of 87 pieces of bacon.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) August 9, 2023
One of great things about coaching teenage soccer players is having them ignore everything you say when they arrive because they have AirPods in
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) August 10, 2023
Each new Taco Bell menu item feels like a dare.
— Dude-Bro Dad (@thedadvocate01) August 9, 2023
I asked my 6yo how his day was at daycare and he said “I don’t even know what happened today”
— Kevin The Dad (@kevinthedad) August 8, 2023
Last night we had Pizza Hut for dinner and when I put it on the table my 7 year-old said 'thank you Italians.' I didn't have the heart to tell him that it was made by a 16 year-old named Travis who has his nipple pierced.
— 🍁Graham Kritzer (@GrahamKritzer) August 10, 2023
I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.
— PUNS (@ThePunnyWorld) August 9, 2023
Secret to a successful marriage is to call your wife at least 7 times a day to help her find her phone
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) August 10, 2023
When I say someone is a good doctor it's entirely based on the strength of their waiting room Wi-Fi.
— Dan Regan (@DanRegan_Comedy) August 10, 2023
8yo: did you know Marco Polo is a college sport?
me: you were watching Water Polo.
8yo: oh, I was wondering why their eyes were open.
— Daddy Go Fish (@daddygofish) August 10, 2023
me: did you shower this week??
8: I don't remember but I did
me: you realize that makes no sense right?
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) August 11, 2023