Welcome to the latest installment of the funniest mom memes and tweets of the week.
Before we begin, a quick tale…
There are times when I’ll think “my god, the kids are exactly like me.”
And then there’s this past Tuesday. The last day of school.
The atmosphere felt like an elementary school pep rally. It’s early dismissal and kids are dancing on the playground and the principal is saying goodbye over an outside intercom and “Celebration” by Kool and the Gang is blasting from speakers inside the gym.
The kids are released to their parents. My son strolls to the car with a huge grin. My daughter is in tears.
Wait, why is she crying? Why is she blubbering and crying?
She explains she’s “going to miss school and her friends and her teacher.”
It’s really quite sweet BUT MAN her and I had different school experiences.
The last day of school for me felt like getting paroled. I couldn’t WAIT to finish school each year. Sure, I’d miss my friends, but I’d see them again in two months. I can’t recall one teacher I liked enough to miss.
In a way, I’m slightly jealous.
And kinda angry because now “Celebration” is stuck in my head.
Please enjoy this collection of mom jokes, puns, memes, and regular old rants from some funny ass mommas.
The expression should be “time flies when your kids are at school.”
— SpacedMom (@copymama) June 14, 2022
My daughter farted at the dinner table and said excuse me.. my son said “excuse me” what are we fancy now?
— Mom Jeans (@momjeansplease) June 12, 2022
My mother-in-law just left, it’ll take me about a month to get my kitchen back the way I like it
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) June 16, 2022
Getting carded in my 40s is the closest thing I’ll ever get to hot girl summer.
— @love.you.memeit (@LMemeit) June 13, 2022
I really thought that by now I would have at least figured out how to make the right amount of rice
— I Hide From My Kids (@IHideFromMyKids) June 13, 2022
HR: Working here is like working with family.
Me: *slams computer closed* Nope!
— Jawbreaker (@sixfootcandy) June 14, 2022
Old fitness goal: 6 pack abs
New fitness goal: Make it through a 30-minute yoga class without farting
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) June 15, 2022
Almost 2 wakes up from his nap and cleans up without any prompting from me. Is this peak parenting?
— 3 Wild Rainbows (@wildrainbow2) June 15, 2022
My money don’t jiggle jiggle.. but my tiddies do
— Emily ™ (@emily_tweets) June 16, 2022
You can have a relaxing day on the water or you can bring your kids, but never both
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) June 15, 2022
If listening to your kid tell a story burned calories, I’d be invisible.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) June 14, 2022
Working from home is fun because a tiny version of myself is dancing in their underwear next to me as I try to maintain a straight face during a meeting
— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) June 15, 2022
Me: 4! you got dressed all by yourself this morning?! that’s awesome!
4: yeah, i peed on the carpet so I had to change
— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) June 15, 2022
I don’t worry about the hate comments I get on social media. My 5yo roasts me better than any of you suckas ever could.
— Mom Meh Dearest🤦🏼♀️ (@mommeh_dearest) June 15, 2022
6yo: mom could you start ironing my t-shirts?
me: *eye twitch intensifies*
— meghan (@deloisivete) June 15, 2022