Welcome to the latest installment of the funniest dad memes and tweets of the week.
Father’s Day is this weekend. I always feel a ton of pressure on Father’s Day. I feel like I’m forced to like a bunch of things I don’t really like.
I don’t like yard work. I don’t care about tools. I play golf (but I suck at it). I don’t rock New Balances.
In other words, I don’t fit in with the “dad stereotypes.”
I do love to nap though.
Oh well.
Please enjoy this collection of dad jokes, puns, memes, and rants from some funny AF dads.
Bought my 10 y/o daughter a camera for vacation and while taking a family photo, she told me, “please get out of my picture, your outfit is clashing today.” The art world is harsh.
— NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) June 15, 2022
Everytime my kids make a dad joke a Home Depot stud finder beeps
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) June 16, 2022
Wife [who turns 50 tomorrow]: Tonight is your last chance to have sex with a woman in her 40s.
Me: Is it, though?
Wife:
Me:
Wife:
Me: I just-
Wife: Blew your last chance, yep.— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) June 14, 2022
My son, 7, has discovered “deez nuts” jokes and it’s all he says now. Everything is deez nuts. He simply can’t stop.
I asked him where he heard that joke. He made me promise that if he told me, he wouldn’t get in trouble. I agreed. So he leans in and whispers, “deez nuts.”
— Dillon Cheverere (@DCheverere) June 10, 2022
Parents: violence is bad
Also parents: hey kids, take this stick and beat the shit out of that frilly donkey until it bleeds candy
— Daddy Go Fish (@daddygofish) June 16, 2022
All men reach an age when we greet each other with "There he is."
— Dan Regan (@Social_Mime) June 15, 2022
Today was a very special occasion for my 5yo. It was the first time he called his mommy Bro.
— Kevin The Dad (@kevinthedad) June 16, 2022
Me: That's funny – I should write it down, but I'm sure I'll remember it in the morning.
Narrator: But he never did.
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) June 17, 2022
Parenthood is seeing how many times you can say "let me think about it" with the hope that your kid forgets to ask again
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) June 15, 2022
Last summer, I did 100 push-ups a day. It wasn’t so bad. It was the brain freezes that got to me the most.
— McDad (@mcdadstuff) June 14, 2022
my superpower is ruining my kids life by telling them to empty the dishwasher in between their schedule of doing nothing and nothing.
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) June 16, 2022
Me (not great with spelling): Why are you so angry, it’s just an old party prank
Friend: *horrified* you drew a penis on my face in SHAR PEI
— ADHDean (@ADHDeanASL) June 16, 2022
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If I missed your favorite dad’s tweet or meme for the week, let me know! Please remember to subscribe to my website to never miss an update if you haven’t already.
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