Welcome to the latest installment of the funniest dad memes and tweets of the week.
Father’s Day is this weekend. I always feel a ton of pressure on Father’s Day. I feel like I’m forced to like a bunch of things I don’t really like.
I don’t like yard work. I don’t care about tools. I play golf (but I suck at it). I don’t rock New Balances.
In other words, I don’t fit in with the “dad stereotypes.”
I do love to nap though.
Please enjoy this collection of dad jokes, puns, memes, and rants from some funny AF dads.
Bought my 10 y/o daughter a camera for vacation and while taking a family photo, she told me, “please get out of my picture, your outfit is clashing today.” The art world is harsh.
— NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) June 15, 2022
Everytime my kids make a dad joke a Home Depot stud finder beeps
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) June 16, 2022
Wife [who turns 50 tomorrow]: Tonight is your last chance to have sex with a woman in her 40s.
Me: Is it, though?
Me: I just-
Wife: Blew your last chance, yep.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) June 14, 2022
My son, 7, has discovered “deez nuts” jokes and it’s all he says now. Everything is deez nuts. He simply can’t stop.
I asked him where he heard that joke. He made me promise that if he told me, he wouldn’t get in trouble. I agreed. So he leans in and whispers, “deez nuts.”
— Dillon Cheverere (@DCheverere) June 10, 2022
Parents: violence is bad
Also parents: hey kids, take this stick and beat the shit out of that frilly donkey until it bleeds candy
— Daddy Go Fish (@daddygofish) June 16, 2022
All men reach an age when we greet each other with "There he is."
— Dan Regan (@Social_Mime) June 15, 2022
Today was a very special occasion for my 5yo. It was the first time he called his mommy Bro.
— Kevin The Dad (@kevinthedad) June 16, 2022
Me: That's funny – I should write it down, but I'm sure I'll remember it in the morning.
Narrator: But he never did.
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) June 17, 2022
Parenthood is seeing how many times you can say "let me think about it" with the hope that your kid forgets to ask again
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) June 15, 2022
Last summer, I did 100 push-ups a day. It wasn’t so bad. It was the brain freezes that got to me the most.
— McDad (@mcdadstuff) June 14, 2022
my superpower is ruining my kids life by telling them to empty the dishwasher in between their schedule of doing nothing and nothing.
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) June 16, 2022
Me (not great with spelling): Why are you so angry, it’s just an old party prank
Friend: *horrified* you drew a penis on my face in SHAR PEI
— ADHDean (@ADHDeanASL) June 16, 2022
If I missed your favorite dad’s tweet or meme for the week, let me know! Please remember to subscribe to my website to never miss an update if you haven’t already.
And if you haven’t checked out my line of customized Post-It Notes with 3M, you should do so immediately!