Nothing much to report this week. Life is good.
Let’s laugh a little.
Enjoy this week’s dad jokes, mom puns, funny tweets, memes, and plain old rants from other parents.
One of the fun things about being a parent is feeling guilty for doing the right thing
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) March 24, 2022
My son constantly complains about work, so I think he'll transition into adulthood quite easily.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) March 25, 2022
“I like to make weird faces at people in other cars so they have a story to tell when they get home.” – my 9yo on how she entertains herself while we drive
— SpacedMom (@copymama) March 25, 2022
My son asked me to pick up a case of plastic water bottles from the grocery store so he could pour the water out and flip them. Just to be clear, this is the generation we are trying to save the environment for?
— Bre (@fullofmonsense) March 24, 2022
Sipping on an iced coffee and bumping ‘03 Bonnie and Clyde in the kindergarten pick up because my kid is still too young to be embarrassed by me.
— Marissa 💚💛 (@michimama75) March 24, 2022
Me: I'm struggling with some demons today
Wife: I thought I told you to stop calling our kids that
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) March 22, 2022
Spring is the time I work hard to convert my winter fat into summer fat.
— The Dad Briefs (@SladeWentworth) March 24, 2022
At the grocery store and dang it, forgot the list. But no worries just gonna follow this other dad around and get what he gets.
— Daddy Go Fish (@daddygofish) March 25, 2022
Me: “Where’s the shirt I took out for you to wear?”
6: “My class already saw that shirt before!”
— redyellowgreendance 💃🏻 (@RYGdance) March 25, 2022
5: You put my watch on upside down.
Me: Meh, you can’t tell time anyways.
— Mom Meh Dearest🤦🏼♀️ (@mommeh_dearest) March 25, 2022
Me: Goodnight sweet girl.
8: Tomorrow I need to dress like Martin Luther King Jr. for my biography.
— @love.you.memeit (@LMemeit) March 25, 2022
My kids are playing in their play room and this what I hear:
"Goddammit! You can't do shit!"
— 3 Wild Rainbows (@wildrainbow2) March 24, 2022
When you raise your kids to be individuals you don't have many family photos but we sure have lots of perfect pics of scenery
— Lara 🌏⬇️🐨 (@Eithercryingor) March 18, 2022
me: how is your pancake, bud?
3yo, rubbing the pancake on his face: it’s soft
— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) March 25, 2022
It's teen girl law that last week's outfit can't be worn this week and the parent who suggested that "It's Friday and no one would know" is the dumbest person alive.
His name is Dad because this Mom knows better.
— KJ (@IDontSpeakWhine) March 25, 2022
me: they recommend to relieve stress to walk away from your desk to take a walk
boss: ok but you've been gone for 4 days
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) March 24, 2022
You’re in your 30’s, the music of your childhood is what you’re jamming to at the grocery store.
— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) March 21, 2022
No the fuck I would not like to see my screen time thank you very much.
— Emily ™ (@emily_tweets) March 25, 2022