Welcome to the newest collection of the funniest mom memes and tweets.
Enjoy this collection of mom jokes, puns, memes, and regular old rants from some funny-as-hell mommas.
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Welcome to Twitter. Someone with zero sense of humor will be along to misunderstand your obvious sarcasm shortly.
— Bird Eckler (@Birdeckler) February 28, 2024
*law and order tone* pic.twitter.com/bvQKiHgYgQ
— Leen McBeans ꪜ (@LeenMcBeans) February 19, 2024
72% of parenting is struggling to picture your child as one day becoming a functioning member of society
— SpacedMom (@copymama) February 27, 2024
I just walked into a Target bathroom & heard someone fighting for life so hard that I wouldn’t be surprised if they were inside out when they were done.
— Kelly (@kelly__le) February 28, 2024
My husband FaceTimed me from the grocery store & asked if I needed anything.
I yelled "TAMPONS!" & now I don't think I'm married anymore.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) February 29, 2024
Someone I know decided to launch a new business based on an idea they stole from me. Guess who just bought up every possible version of the company's domain? 😁
— sixfootcandy (@sixfootcandy) February 28, 2024
The highlight of my career was when we had to terminate something within our business and they let me call it Project Arnold
— Sam G (@ItsSamG) February 21, 2024
“Would you like your receipt?”
Yes please as I was in a daze when I used my card and have no idea how much I paid.
— Late to the party Laura (@ericamorecambe) February 28, 2024
My 4yo spent the night with my parents last night. My mom asked her what her bedtime is. She looked my mom dead in the eye and said seriously with zero hesitation, 10:30
— The Mom Hack (@TheMomHack) February 25, 2024
I am sitting in the parking lot at Target and the two cars closest to me also have women sitting in them looking at their phones. This is our church
— nice things I say to myself (@meantomyself) February 28, 2024
My youngest told me he's not a fan of chocolate and caramel together please respect my privacy as I come to terms with this information
— Helleanor Rigby (@Mom_Overboard) February 27, 2024
11yo: Do you know where my sunglasses are?
Me: The car?
11yo: No, I looked.
Two days later, while driving my kid to school.
11yo: My sunglasses!
— krista pacion (@kristabellerina) February 28, 2024
I understand why you would choose a $200/night hotel over a $100/night hotel. What I don’t understand are $600/night hotels. How could they POSSIBLY be that much better?? It has always baffled me.
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) February 29, 2024
I've had the Inspector Gadget theme stuck in my head for the past 27 years
— inspector ratchet (@_hood_mona_lisa) February 28, 2024
My 6yo is chanting all the words that rhyme with sucker and this is going to end badly in about 3 seconds
— meghan (@deloisivete) February 29, 2024
The main difference between my dog and my kid is my dog responds to her name being called
— I Hide From My Kids (@IHideFromMyKids) February 27, 2024
Normal Adults: Sorry I’m late, I was indisposed
Parents: Sorry I’m late, I had to go poopy on the potty
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) February 28, 2024
a weighted blanket just isn't cutting it anymore. i need a hydraulic press
— snacky 🫧 (@candyflippin) February 21, 2024
I need a pizza, but I also need my jeans to fit. And I also want world peace. So you see my dilemma.
— your other mom (@difficultpatty) February 28, 2024
Somebody just said, "You suck, Emma." And I have to tell you that this resonated with me on a deep spiritual level.
— Emma Beasley🐝 (@JustBeingEmma) February 25, 2024
moms should have call signs like pilots, mine’s gonna be NOTNOW
— nika (@nikalamity) February 28, 2024
Me:
3yo: MOMMY, STOP TALKING.
— Jennifer Parker (@Mrs_JParker) February 28, 2024
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