First off, did you get either of my new line of Post-It Notes with 3M? Why the hell not! It’s the least you can do. Get on that right damn now.
Second, how are you holding up? Doing ok? The holidays are almost over. You’ll make it. I believe in you.
You probably just need a laugh.
Here are this week’s dad jokes, mom puns, funny tweets, memes, and plain old rants from other parents.
Any followers from kilburn? My tweet is apparently up today in the train station in London.. pic.twitter.com/eL0LlATtPU
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) December 17, 2021
Me: I have a headache.
WebMD: and it will be your last.
— Leticia (@Olivemadsci) December 14, 2021
Overheard at the grocery store today.
“Queen wasn’t even famous until that movie came out.” pic.twitter.com/Coj0sZgQCc
— Jingle Bell Jawbreaker 🎄 (@sixfootcandy) December 2, 2021
me: if you were a bear, what would your name be?
4: Tommy the chicken!
— Kevin The Dad (@kevinthedad) December 16, 2021
So, last night we assembled that play kitchen from Santa in our living room then I hid it in the garage, but I left out the instruction manual and my 4 year old found it this morning. I froze. She said, "Oh cool! I want this for Christmas!" and ran off. That's a yuletide win.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) December 12, 2021
The most unrealistic part of Home Alone is that Kevin cleaned up the mess and you fucking know it
— Mom Jeans (@momjeansplease) December 11, 2021
Went to a store today and it appears I have waited too late and now my family will be getting Valentines Day stuff for Christmas.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) December 16, 2021
My husband has a lot of suggestions about how to decorate a Christmas tree for someone who has never decorated a Christmas tree
— Maryfairyboberry🧚🏻♀️ (@maryfairybobrry) December 17, 2021
I'm at the age where "This will be so much fun" and "This is a terrible idea" mean exactly the same thing.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) December 16, 2021
My husband said he wanted a divorce this morning. I mean he didn’t say it but he took the last cup of coffee so…
— Sweet Momissa (@sweetmomissa) December 14, 2021
Christmas season means listening to my kids argue all the way to a lights display.
Then pausing to Ooh and aah at the lights.
And continuing to argue the whole way home.
— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) December 15, 2021
MORE STUFF TO READ