Welcome to the newest collection of the funniest mom memes and tweets.
Enjoy this collection of mom jokes, puns, memes, and regular old rants from some funny-as-hell mommas.
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Why has no one has trademarked “Prozacco?” Wine moms everywhere would be so happy.
— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) April 16, 2024
I have to be careful about how many things I ask my 10yr old to do in a day – as she will have an injury seconds before doing anything every time.
— Late to the party Laura (@ericamorecambe) April 17, 2024
I’ll jump off that bridge when we get there.
— Not Hot. Not Bothered. (@hunbothered) April 9, 2024
i’M gOiNg tO bEd eArLy ToNiGhT
— me lying to my own damn face every night
— Jennifer Parker (@Mrs_JParker) April 16, 2024
Husband: Where are you going?
Me: I have to run a quick errand.
Husband: You're going to the store to buy dessert and eat it in the car so you don’t have to share it with the kids?
Me: Maybe.
Husband: Let me grab my wallet.
— sixfootcandy (@sixfootcandy) April 3, 2024
My favorite part of the day is when my kids are getting along and playing nicely together all .004 seconds of it!
— Mommeh Dearest (@mommeh_dearest) April 13, 2024
Dropping a kid at a grandparent’s is like taking a car into the mechanic, you drop them because they’re driving you crazy and when you pick them up the grandparents are like: I don’t know what the problem is, your child is a perfect angel…for me
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) April 16, 2024
I like when a person shows me kindness by pretending they didn't see me repeatedly pull on the door handle before I finally realized the door said PUSH – in huge letters.
— Hollie Harris (@allholls) April 15, 2024
Why do we all stand with our hands on our hips at the gym? When did this start? Who decided this was the stance and why did we all just follow suit?
— Sam G (@ItsSamG) April 17, 2024
The amount of cheese I buy is between me and god and this 17yo cashier
— meghan (@deloisivete) April 17, 2024
New day.
New minor inconveniences to be over dramatic about. 💅🏻
— Kelly (@kelly__le) April 16, 2024
Imagine falling in love and then finding out they're mean to strangers on the internet.
— your other mom (@difficultpatty) April 16, 2024
People that only compliment you because you complimented them first and it made them uncomfy
— Leen McBeans ꪜ (@LeenMcBeans) April 14, 2024
[Chaperoning a 4th grade field trip]
Child 1: I can speak 3 languages!
Me: 🙂
Child 2: My dad had a really rough childhood!
Me: 😟
Child 3: My favorite NBA team is the Pacers!
Me: 🙂
Child 4: Why does your hair look like that!?
Me: 😟— DonutHawk (@StruggleDisplay) April 16, 2024
My 9yo’s one-man show has a surprise ending. The surprise is that it doesn’t.
— I Hide From My Kids (@IHideFromMyKids) April 16, 2024
What's the first thing you take off when you get home from work and if it's not a tie between your bra and earrings you're gonna have to explain it to me
— nice things I say to myself (@meantomyself) April 16, 2024
I wish I loved anything as much as the charmin bears love pooping.
— Wisecracking Blonde (@RoobsC) April 16, 2024
Me when I pretend to fall asleep during my kids bedtime: 🤫🥱😴💤
Me trying to fall asleep in my own bed: 🙃🤔🤯🫨— Parenting Presently (The Mom Hack) (@presentparent_) April 17, 2024
I've gotten 4 rejections from literary agents, but at least my 11yo believes in me. pic.twitter.com/geKdPxI5tK
— Laura Marie (@lmegordon) April 12, 2024
I liked this and I will add to it. When parents say “just try it you will like it” lie.