Welcome to the latest installment of the week’s funniest mom memes and tweets.
Sit down and enjoy this collection of dad jokes, puns, memes, and rants from some funny AF dads.
7YO: I don’t want to wake up
Me: It’s school day
7YO *sighs*: I’m too tired to be human
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) December 15, 2022
Liquor store cashier: You must be hosting a Christmas party
Me, with a full cart: Yeah that’s it, a Christmas party
— Mike (@Parentpains) December 13, 2022
I asked my 6 year-old son what his favorite part of the Christmas holidays has been and this child said it's "in Home Alone when Kevin hits Marv in the head with a bunch of bricks"
— 🍁Yukon Cornelius (@GrahamKritzer) December 13, 2022
teenagers will really look you directly in the face and say they showered today all while smelling like rotten taco bell and onions.
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) December 15, 2022
It’s my job to make sure every door is locked at night, and I take that shit seriously
— McDad (@mcdadstuff) December 15, 2022
When my wife packs for a trip she technically moves out.
— Dan Regan (@Social_Mime) December 15, 2022
I set up our Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, all the Wise Men are just standing around, looking down at their phones.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) December 15, 2022
The downside of being in a school carpool is you have to change your clothes everyday
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) December 15, 2022
[first day as a superhero]
Villain: Why is my calendar wrapped in aluminum?
Me: I foiled your plans.
[I am immediately killed]
— PUNS (@ThePunnyWorld) December 16, 2022
“Daddy, it’s time to wake up. I gave you an extra hour to sleep!”
– My 5yo at 6:21am this morning
— Kevin The Dad (@kevinthedad) December 14, 2022
“But dad, coal would actually be a good present because it keeps people warm.”
Good. He won’t be disappointed then.
— Dude-Bro Dad (@thedadvocate01) December 12, 2022
I don’t know who is more excited about no homework until after the holidays, me or my 9yo.
— Dad Named Matt 🇺🇸 (@mahnamematt) December 11, 2022
My daughter is not participating in Throwback Thursday theme day at her middle school because her friends planned on dressing like the 2000s and wearing a side part and she “just can’t, ew.”
— NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) December 15, 2022
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