Welcome to the latest installment of the week’s funniest dad memes and tweets.
Grab a seat and enjoy this collection of dad jokes, puns, memes, and rants from some funny AF dads.
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my 8yo’s older cousin: I got an F in math
my 8yo: you should ask your teacher why she gave you a letter for a subject that’s all about numbers
— Daddy Go Fish (@daddygofish) June 15, 2023
40% of mine and my wife's conversations go like this:
me: what?
wife: i was talking to the dog— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) June 15, 2023
I’m “my parents want to go home so it’s time to go” years old
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) June 16, 2023
I’m keeping the romance alive by gift wrapping my Father’s Day gift, which my wife asked me to order from Amazon
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) June 16, 2023
A police officer just knocked on my door and told me that my dogs are chasing people on bikes.
That’s ridiculous, because my dogs don’t even own bikes.
— PUNS (@ThePunnyWorld) June 12, 2023
My 6 year-old: dad what is a wart
Me: why
My 6 year-old: is it contagious?
Me (growing concerned): WHY
My 6 year-old: can your finger fall off?
Me: whose wart did you touch
My 6 year old:….
My 6 year old:….
My 6 year old: Maybe Jacob's
— 🍁Graham Kritzer (@GrahamKritzer) June 8, 2023
My 5yo told me I’m about to go to heaven because I’m a little chubby, so I got that going for me, I reckon.
— Dad Named Matt 🇺🇸 (@mahnamematt) June 15, 2023
Whenever I hear my wife banging things around in some other part of the house, I know something is my fault or is going to be my fault
— McDad (@mcdadstuff) June 15, 2023
41 years old and I find myself in the grip of an identity crisis. Do I became a hat guy or a shaved-head guy?
— Dude-Bro Dad (@thedadvocate01) June 11, 2023
Keep your friends close and put your enemies in a group text.
— Dan Regan (@Social_Mime) June 15, 2023
When I was a kid I’d be stoked to stay home from school because I could watch Lamb Chop’s Play-Along. When my 6yo stays home from school he gets to choose what to watch from every kids show ever. His options do not end. They just go on and on my friend.
— Kevin The Dad (@kevinthedad) June 15, 2023
I'm at my most Ninja when trying to throw out all the crap my kids brought home on their last day of school without them noticing.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) June 16, 2023
Wife: Isn’t it ridiculous how in TV shows a character will tell someone to meet them at a certain time without even checking that person’s schedule?
Me: You do that to me literally all the time
— Dad Pickup Line (@dadpickupline) June 15, 2023
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