Unless he’s asked, my dad isn’t the type of person to give out advice. He’s a listener.
Forty years working as a bartender will teach a person just to use their ears.
My mother will argue my father has mastered “selective listening” and somehow catches every word except the words that come out of her mouth.
Patrons would frequent the bar for libations, laughs, and just to use my dad as a sounding board.
Work sucks? Tell the bartender. Wife won’t stop nagging? Tell the bartender. Celebrating a milestone that everyone else in your life forgot about? Tell the bartender while buying him a round.
I’m sure people tried to buy my old man a drink during his forty years behind the bar. I’d be absolutely shocked to find out he ever drank one. I’ll have to ask him the next time we talk.
While my dad was likely able to talk his way out of Jack Daniel’s shots at eleven in the morning, it’s improbable to think he could excuse himself from this tavern confessions and whiskey as acts of contrition without doling out a diminutive nugget of publican wisdom.
The guidance likely sounded similar to the one phrase my father expounded every time I found myself face-to-face with a dilemma.
“You’re not the first and you won’t be the last.”
On the surface, this statement doesn’t sound like advice at all. It doesn’t help to choose a path or bring confidence when circling an answer on the multiple-choice questions in life but the simplicity of the proclamation does bring a sense of peace to the situation.
No matter the situation, you’re not the first person in history to find yourself at this crossroads, and after you choose the left or right path, another person will do the same in the very near future.
Millions of people were forced into their homes for long stretches of time over the last 18 months and compelled to find a new normal but there was a comfort in thinking “ok, I’m not the only person whose life just got turned upside down.”
Life doesn’t feel as lonely when you stop to think you’re not the only person dealing with a specific issue.
My dad’s advice isn’t profound. It’s a little bit of Fortune Cookie logic than encouragement or consultation but I still find myself repeating it out loud in those moments when the fit hits the shan and I’m wondering “ugh, why me?!?!”
It always helps.
Happy Father’s Day.
OTHER STUFF I DID ON INSTAGRAM THAT YOU PROBABLY MISSED
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OTHER THINGS I DID WHEN I WASN’T WRITING NOTES
ON LAST WEEK’S EPISODE OF “WE RUN THIS”
Christie Aschwanden is here to set the record straight about which the real ways to recovery and all of the unnecessary – and expensive – recovery products and promises athletes of all levels should avoid.
Christie is the author of “Good to Go: What the Athlete in All of Us Can Learn from the Strange Science of Recovery” and the former lead science writer at FiveThirtyEight. She’s also a frequent contributor to The New York Times and a former columnist for the Washington Post.
ON LAST WEEK’S EPISODE OF “NOT ABOUT WRESTLING”
Our guest on the show this week is comedian and radio show host, Justin Schlegel. Justin is the co-host of Baltimore’s number one morning show, the Justin, Scott & Spiegel Morning Show on 98 Rock, and part of Die Laughing Productions’ popular murder mysteries.
STUFF I WROTE ABOUT THAT WASN’T ON STICKY NOTES
- Good News For Parents – IRS Reveals When New Advance Child Tax Credit Will Hit Their Bank Accounts
- Here Are The State Economies Rebounding Post-Pandemic – And The Areas Of The Country Still Struggling
- Do These 3 Things Immediately To Boost Your Retirement Savings
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